Celebrating Fathers Day without a Dad
My son is 10 and although I think he is exceptional in every way, he is just a typical pre-pubescent boy. We are a family, just the two of us (+ 3 cute but annoying cats) because I decided to become a mother on my own. We live in the “burbs”” and have a home with a white picket fence on a dead end street. He goes to a charter school with the same 20 kids in his class since kindergarten, has tons of friends and activities that keep him busy. Our life is truly the American Dream (according to public opinion). We just don’t have a dad and it really isn’t even a topic of conversation normally except this time of year.
The not having a dad conversation starts happening around Mother’s Day. This year he had a plan and needed someone to drive him to the mall to get the special gift for me but it seemed his schedule and everyone he asked to take him just didn’t jive. Boy was he frustrated and a bit bummed and since he’s 10 he really was able to communicate how unfair it was that he didn’t have a dad. It just made me smile because his idea of a dad was someone to take him places and maybe give him some money.
This year was the first year we had that serious discussion about my choice to be a single mom. I asked him if was he ever sad that he didn’t have a dad to take him to play sports, or be in the audience when he got an award or help him build things (he loves tools and wood). He just laughed and said really mom “Why would I need a dad for all those things, I have you and I know how to build stuff on my own!”
Raising a son without a dad has its challenges but it’s enlightening to see my son grow into a caring, sensitive independent little man. There are moments that I wish he had a dad, but those moments are only because I want someone else to share in my complete joy of raising such an amazing kid.
Note: Just changed pix to go with blog post. BW pix is #Sarah Leddick who was my inspiration for becoming a single mom